I’m fairly certain that my children emerged into this world, blinked their eyes, and then, before doing anything else, asked, “Why?”
Why is that bird red?
Why do I have to wear shoes outside?
Why can’t I have ice cream for breakfast?
Why can’t I take the slugs on the bus? (That was from my daughter. Yes, the girl-child.)
There were times I just want to tape myself saying, “Because I said so.” But I’m not sure that would actually work . . . or be helpful . . . especially when said in the tone of voice I usually reserve for the end of my patience.
As my kids have entered elementary school and middle school, their why questions have gotten more difficult, and often surround the media that saturates our culture.
Why can’t I watch this movie?
Everyone’s reading that book, why can’t I?
Why do you have to check this app before I can download it?
What can’t I have a phone, too?
It’s tempting to just ignore them, but there are good reasons why you should answer your kids “Why” questions. [tweetthis display_mode=”button_link”] It’s tempting to just ignore them, but there are good reasons why you should answer your kids “Why” questions. [/tweetthis]
- It might just stop the questions.
My kids aren’t dumb, and I’m guessing yours aren’t either. If you equip your kids with a complete understanding of the issue, they might see the answer for themselves and alleviate the necessity to ask you. Tell your kids they can’t watch the movie or read the book because studies show that your brain doesn’t make much distinction between seeing or reading something and actually experiencing it. It can actually change your brain.
- It establishes you as the authority.
Every kid has questions. If they know you’ll take them seriously and give them an answer, they’re more likely to KEEP coming to you with their questions.
- The answers to why are at the foundation of a belief system.
Answering why establishes reasonable arguments for why you do what you do, and believe what you believe. It gives your kids a foundation to make their own decisions and build a sound structure for their own lives. If there’s no foundation, when the storms come, …well, let’s just say it might not be good.
- You might find that your reasons aren’t good enough.
Before you write this off as irrelevant or impossible, let’s be honest with ourselves. If you and I are truthful, we have to admit we don’t know everything. And since we’ve raised our kids, they’ve likely learned some things from us along the way. It might be worth hearing the reasons behind wanting to play the latest game. The logic may not be as far off as we thought.
Answering why isn’t always easy, but no one ever said parenting was easy.
Of course, your answers always need to be age appropriate, and YOU, as the parent, have the final say on what media your child consumes. If you’d like some help determining what movies are appropriate, Dove is a great place to start.
In the meantime, we’d love to hear from you.
What are some of your great answers to your kids why questions? Have your children ever stumped you with a question? How did you respond? What are some other resources you use to help you give direction to your kids?
Comments? Questions? Leave them here. We’d love to hear from you.
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